turned and vanished and as she turned with a twirl, he caught a glimpse of lacy underwear. His heart gave a leap.

His reverie was broken by the sound of his mother's voice calling him for supper. Throughout the meal he was aware of no one but Marian at whom he surreptitious- ly glanced from time to time. He felt strange though. He knew that he already liked her and at the same time he felt in some peculiar way as though he were her. He could not make this out. He could not know that his mother had longed for a daughter; she had never ment- ioned this but he did recall how she often took him when she went shopping for new clothes and always, be- fore she left, she would make her way through the girls' department. J. C. would tag along though at first he had felt embarrassed but soon came to accept this as something his mother had to do since he loved her, he went along with it. Now he recalled how she would fondle the pretty girls' things and then J. C. knew that he had seen pretty panties before there in the shops.

He also remembered now that on occasions his moth- er had called him Shelley and then passed it off as best she could. It suddenly was clear to J. C. that his mother missed very much having a daughter. Then he remembered something that he must have forgotten. One day he had been in his mother's room looking for some money; his mother had said he could have some for a show. But he could not find her purse so had be- gun to look for it. After looking around the room and in one or two drawers, he had opened a closet door and found himself face to face with a mannikin--a girl mannikin-pretty and arrayed in lovely clothes. Hang- ing in the closet were all kinds of dainty apparel. The closet also contained drawers and had he opened them he would have found them filled with pretty underwear. At the time it had not occurred to him why the manni- kin was there and he had never asked his mother, but now it all seemed clear. Moreover, for some reason he felt sorry for his mother and also, in some etrange way, he felt with and for her. He thought of the times she had insisted on taking photos of him and how she had always remarked that he was very good-looking and had nice hair. Boys at school sometimes kidded him about the wave in it.

44.